September 23, 2008

Confessions of a Tone-Deaf Hairbrush Singer

The door closes behind him, as I prepare to take center stage. For the next twenty minutes while he runs to the store, our living room is no longer a living room but a packed venue filled with thousands of screaming fans.

My screaming fans.

I stand in the imaginary spotlight clutching my hairbrush microphone, as I wait for the music to begin. After what seems like an eternity, iTunes finally launches and syncs wirelessly to the speakers across the room. And the twangy chords of a banjo in a country song float happily through the air.

I belt out the lyrics and I rock out the chorus. I hold the high notes longer than Miss Carrie Underwood herself.

I dance, I shimmy, and I work that crowd like nobody’s business.

I point, I high five, I jam with the bass player, Jim.

For one shining moment, I. AM. A. STAR. All the world’s a stage and I alone hold the hairbrush microphone. I can already see my debut album skyrocketing to the top of the charts, and I make a mental note to start practicing my autograph. But just then iTunes quits unexpectedly, and reality sets in with a thud at the scary sound of my own voice without the benefit of a volume turned wayyyy up.

The packed arena quickly fades into nothing as the roar of ten thousand fans becomes merely a whisper; and once again the all too familiar sight of our own couch & chair comes back into focus. Truth is, I couldn’t carry a tune in a bucket even if I had TWELVE buckets. Twelve buckets AND a wheel barrow… y’know like one of those industrial strength ones from Home Depot.

Never have, never will. But that sure doesn’t stop me from dreaming. And as I turn back to see my husband, who was standing there in the doorway all along, he just smiles and says “Sing it again, darlin.”

That’s when I know… I’ve already got all the fans I’ll ever need.

  1. Faith Piper

    OMG! I’m so gushy! You totally have me tearing up with this story!!! I’m so blessed to have met you two!!!!

    LOVE, LOVE,LOVE!

  2. amber

    You guys are so gross ;)

  3. Mary Marantz

    Lol! I know it’s NAUSEATING, right??

  4. Dorelies

    congratulations – just great!!!!!!

  5. Christy Murray Carmody

    I LOVE IT, LOVE IT, LOVE IT! Great work guys!

  6. Mary Marantz

    Thanks Christy!!

  7. Scarlett Lillian

    Awwwwwwwwwww that was the cutest thing EVER! I’ve always wondered how I am going to manage my hairbrush singing when I get married. I’m going to have to make my husband take lots of trips to the store too… but lock the door behind him so he doesn’t spy on me like Justin did to you! he he

    LOVE LOVE LOVE the new blogsite!!!

  8. Shy

    I just keep hitting refresh…. over and over and over ;)

  9. Rene Tate

    You and I could be some serious friends I think! haha This is the story of my life…. :)

  10. Michael and Carina

    Love seeing where you guys started and how far you’ve come!

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