There is this thing about me that most people never believe right away….I am an introvert.
And the reason they don’t get that usually, the reason they find it so hard to believe, is that I do have this good streak of a temporary extrovert running right through me. See I have moments of turning it on. Glimpses of social butterfly syndrome. Fleeting scenes of working the room. I am occasionally witty, sporadically entertaining, and just a little bit charming every now and then. :)
But believe me, it never lasts.
See it’s not this thing that I can necessarily put on intentionally. Or a switch that I can always flip. It’s not like I’m Beyonce (how fun it would be to be Beyonce, btw?) and this is my Sasha Fierce. It’s not my alter ego or a mask I wear to the world. It’s never me pretending to be somebody I’m not. It’s just that sometimes….I have a little more bubbly in me than other times (bubbly like the personality, not the champagne. Although that definitely helps too :)
But even in my most on fire, life of the party moments….I still always come crashing down when it’s over. I have to retreat to the quiet corners of my life and recharge like a tank that’s running on empty. I thrive on the quiet moments. I find my energy in the stillness. And I would trade a thousand cocktail conversations for one deep, meaningful one that fuels my heart.
And the real truth is….I like being an introvert. I think for far too long introverts have gotten a bad rap. We’ve been told over and over again that we have to change all these pieces about who we are in order to be successful. And I just don’t think it’s true. After all, introverts are thoughtful. And we spend time thinking about why we do what we do. Introverts listen more than we seek to be heard. And we prove over & over again that usually it’s the quieter voice that people lean in to. Introverts dig deeper. We want to know the story below the surface. And we believe that each story is worth really hearing. Most people listen in order to respond. Introverts listen because we really care what you have to say.
So there you go. Introverts of the world UNITE! :) And if you aren’t an introvert, here are some things you probably need to know in order to take care of the introverts in your life:
*We’ll go to the party. We may even give you a good hour or two of talking to people. But when that crash starts coming, this is not a drill! You better get us out of there FAST…and home to a nice quiet room. No need to talk on the way there! :)
*Definitely don’t call us on the phone. The phone is our kryptonite. All of my introvert friends agree, we’ve been known to screen calls even from friends. Instead send us an email…or come tell it to us in person. Preferably with wine and long, meaningful conversations where we talk about things that matter.
*Don’t tell us we’re being quiet. We already know. That will just make us even more quiet.
* We’re quiet, not stuck up! :) I don’t think there’s an introvert in the world out there who hasn’t at one point or another been confused as just being too good to talk to somebody. This is especially tough for the extroverted introvert, where people are used to seeing you be more outgoing. If you see us being quiet, just assume that we’re tired, hungry, or have simply used up our word count for the day.
*When you’re talking to us try to keep it to the length of a match burning down and then give us a break to ponder & respond to what you’ve just said. People who talk and talk and talk without taking a breath have the same result on us as what happens when Rogue from X-Men touches someone without her gloves….it sucks the life right out of us! Unplug for a little while, let us recover!
*Loud is our enemy. Loud people, loud rooms. You want to make an introvert shut down faster than ever? Put them in a loud situation and make them shout over people to be heard. We would much rather whisper over a cozy cup of coffee.
*Our couch is the new hot spot in town that we want to go check out. Join us there won’t you.
*Introverts make awesome friends. We’re not looking over your shoulder to see the next person we should be talking to. And we don’t collect friends like other people collect baseball cards. If you are lucky enough to win over an introvert, you will have a friend for life! :)
So go hug an introvert today! M:)